Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Don't tell me you're on acid again
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
