Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Randomize
