she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
