hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
