yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
