I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
