Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
