I'm drive I can fine osifer
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
