Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Randomize
