Your tits are I can't wait for
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
We left an ass print on the piano.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
