Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i came on her dog
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
