I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
sex in a hospital.. check
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
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