How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
