is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
4 words: hood of his car
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
