Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
