So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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