He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
