The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
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