I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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