Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
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