you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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