I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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