I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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