Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
