never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
