It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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