sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
