Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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