people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
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