I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
