I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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