suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
