I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
if only i could text you this smell
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Randomize
