That's intense
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
