Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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