Porn is love you can see.
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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