p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
How drunk are you?
Completed.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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