these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
