Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
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