i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize