he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
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