I smell stomach acid.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I didn't notice because vodka
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Randomize
