Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize