getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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