I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I need a burrito and a hug.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
