I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
operation have a gay friend backfired
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize