He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
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