i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
