it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize