oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
