in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
