You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
